Sharon Xabregas: Silence to Strength | Sharing Stories Changing Lives
Sharon Zabregas, a deaf entrepreneur, shares her journey from silence to strength, overcoming workplace adversity.
Dive Deeper: The Full Conversation with Sharon Xabregas
The Core Story
Sharon Zabregas, a deaf entrepreneur, shares her journey from silence to strength, overcoming workplace adversity. She grew up bilingual with Auslan sign language and faced challenges communicating with others. Sharon experienced bullying in the workplace but persevered, advocating for inclusivity. She founded Sign Here, offering Auslan teaching, employment support, and advocacy. Collaborations with organizations like Bus Stop Films and Job Access contributed to Sign Here's growth. Sharon advises families with hard of hearing members to seek support and provide bilingual communication options. She shared her story at live events like the Story Room, emphasizing the power of storytelling to create change. Sharon's resilience and determination exemplify the transformative impact of sharing stories and fostering inclusivity.
Time-Stamped Breakthrough Moments
[00:05:30] – Growing Up Bilingual: How Sharon uses "fingerspelling" in her head to visualize how to spell English words.
[00:12:45] – The 80s & Hearing Aids: A raw look at the bullying Sharon faced and how the lack of awareness in schools created a lonely environment.
[00:18:20] – The "Deaf Card" & Gaslighting: Sharon shares the painful details of workplace bullying that led to her hair loss and her decision to leave.
[00:26:40] – The Birth of Sign Here: How the Deaf community reached out to Sharon during COVID-19, leading to a business that grew from 1 to 17 staff members.
[00:34:15] – Advice for Parents: A beautiful message to parents of newly diagnosed deaf children: "Congratulations on your baby... it's a special community."
[00:41:00] – The Lip-Reading Marathon: Karen reflects on the incredible mental effort Sharon exerts to participate in a podcast via lip-reading alone.
Full Episode Transcript
KAREN:
I would like to acknowledge the Guringai people and pay my respects to Elders both past and present. The Guringai people are the traditional owners of this land where we meet today.
Podcast Intro (Narration)
NARRATOR:
Welcome to Sharing Stories, Changing Lives.
Host Karen Sander has the privilege of interviewing individuals from all walks of life, each with their own powerful and inspiring stories. The guests share their life experiences and, in doing so, they celebrate the transformative magic of storytelling.
To learn more, visit www.thestoryroom.au and explore the private membership area, The Backstage Pass.
Opening
KAREN:
In the vast landscape of remarkable people, very few have encountered the inspiring Sharon Zabregas and her journey from silence to strength.
What makes Sharon’s story truly exceptional is the adversity she faced as a deaf individual in the workplace.
Today, we’re going to delve into Sharon’s personal journey – from overcoming the challenges of being deaf in a hearing world to evolving into a passionate advocate and entrepreneur.
Welcome, Sharon Zabregas.
SHARON:
Thank you for having me, Karen.
KAREN:
I am so excited, because I’ve never done a podcast with someone who is deaf – and as I’ve been learning from you, it’s important to say you identify as deaf, not just “hard of hearing”.
Just tell us a little bit about you.
Growing Up Deaf & Bilingual
SHARON:
My name is Sharon, and my last name is Zabregas – and you said it really well, so I’m very proud of you, Karen!
I actually identify as deaf. I was born deaf. My parents had three children – I was the third one – and my brother is also deaf, so it was a recessive gene between my parents.
Auslan – Australian Sign Language – was my first language. I started speaking when I was about five.
KAREN:
I just want to let people listening know that you actually can’t hear me at all.
You’re watching me on our recording platform, you’re lip-reading my questions, and you’re signing at the same time to help yourself stay on track and answer. I just take my hat off to you.
SHARON:
Thank you. And thank you so much for having me as well. It’s actually my first time doing a podcast, so we’re in the same boat – first time for both of us in different ways.
KAREN:
First time for me interviewing someone who’s deaf, and first time for you on a podcast.
Let’s go back. In your early days, before you really understood what “being deaf” meant, are there any memories that stand out? How did you cope with the challenges in communication and understanding?
SHARON:
That question was actually a little bit hard for me to reflect on, because I didn’t really have a single moment where I “realised” I was deaf.
I grew up signing with my brother at home. There were lots of mimes, lots of gestures. I loved reading and writing. Because my brother and sister are nine and ten years older than me, I was home alone a lot, so I got used to reading and drawing.
I didn’t realise Auslan was a language that not many people knew. I just assumed everyone knew sign language.
So the shock came later – realising that people didn’t understand me. That was confusing.
“You Have an Aussie Accent” & Being Bilingual
KAREN:
I can imagine how confusing that would be.
I asked you the other day – and it fascinated me – because you speak so clearly, and you have what I’d call an Aussie accent, yet you’ve never actually heard that accent.
SHARON:
It was really funny when you said I had an Aussie accent, because I don’t know what an Aussie accent sounds like. So that was very funny for me!
KAREN:
It really struck me, because when I’m talking to you, it’s a lot to process that you can’t hear anything I say.
You also told me you’re bilingual. Can you explain what that means for you?
SHARON:
Bilingual means having – and being fluent in – two languages. For me, that’s Auslan and spoken English.
Sometimes my thoughts growing up were a mix of both. I’d communicate with my family in spoken English and Auslan at the same time. If I went out in the community, I often signed as well – and people would look at me strangely, wondering why I was signing.
I also fingerspell a lot. You know when you’re writing a word and it doesn’t look right, and you keep changing it until it does? I do that in my head with fingerspelling.
I’ll fingerspell a word, and once it “feels” right in my hands, I’ll write it. I didn’t realise that was odd until my family would come up and ask, “Mum, can you help me spell this word?” and I’d stand there fingerspelling, then tell them, and they’d look at me like that was really strange.
But for me, that was my first language – it was natural.
I also went to a mainstream school where some teachers would use sign language and speak, so that helped me develop that bilingual access.
Speech Therapy & Limited Services
KAREN:
When we were talking online, you mentioned you had a lot of speech therapy. Can you explain that?
SHARON:
When I was born, my parents were very upset, because they already had a son who was profoundly deaf. At that time he was nine, non-verbal and only signed.
So when they found out their third child – me – was also deaf, they were emotional and worried.
They decided to try a different approach with me. They wanted to give me access to both sign language and spoken language.
At that time, there were no services that really supported both. If you went to a spoken-language service, they wanted you to focus only on speech and not sign – because they believed signing would hinder speech.
If you went to an Auslan-focused service, they would discourage spoken language.
So my parents found it really hard to find an organisation that supported both.
They decided to put me into a mainstream school at the age of three – that was pretty normal for deaf kids of my generation. A lot of us started school early.
Then they paid for a private speech therapist to help me learn to speak. So I had that alongside school and Auslan.
I was lucky to have access to both, but I know a lot of families didn’t have the ability to pay for private speech therapy every week.
School, Bullying & Hearing Aids in the 80s
KAREN:
Did you find going to school difficult?
SHARON:
Because I started at three, they didn’t even have a uniform in my size. I was so little!
I actually loved going to school because I had access to communication in my language. I often felt a bit lonely at home, so going to school and being able to communicate was exciting.
But as I got older, I realised I was different. Kids would come up and ask about my hearing aids.
In the 80s, AIDS was a huge topic. People were very scared of contracting AIDS. Children thought that because I had hearing aids, I had AIDS.
So there was a lot of bullying. I was confused – there wasn’t a lot of awareness around deafness and hearing aids. It was not easy growing up.
KAREN:
Did you have any really close friends who stood by you?
SHARON:
I had lots of friends growing up, including other deaf and hard of hearing kids.
But I was a bit unique. A lot of my friends were either profoundly deaf and couldn’t speak at all, or they were hearing and didn’t know how to communicate with me.
So I felt in between.
As I started speaking more, people assumed I could hear. But I still missed out on a lot and found that really hard.
So yes, I had friends, but it was hard for them to truly understand what my experience was like.
KAREN:
Did your brother eventually learn to speak?
SHARON:
He’s now 49 and still non-verbal. He only communicates in Auslan.
The day my parents found out I was deaf, the only person running around the house joyful was my brother. He was so happy to have a sister who was deaf.
KAREN:
That’s amazing – it must have given him a new lease on life.
SHARON:
It did. And we’re still very close today.
Entering the Workforce & Hidden Barriers
KAREN:
I’d like to jump to when you finished school and went into the workforce.
Can you share your early experiences – whether you went to university, what kind of jobs you did – and the challenges you encountered as a deaf person? Was the workplace inclusive?
SHARON:
I’ll try my best to answer that.
I was really excited about starting my first job, but I quickly realised how hard it was to explain to someone that I was deaf.
If I was in an interview next to a person exactly like me but not deaf, chances were that person would get the job over me. Discrimination is real.
Looking back, I can understand that a lot of organisations didn’t know how to provide support. They didn’t have awareness.
So I started going to interviews and not telling them I was deaf. But I dug myself into a hole, because once I started working, I struggled – I needed access to communication, and I needed it quickly, and I didn’t have it.
Very early on, I started to struggle in my workplaces.
As I grew older, I became stronger at self-advocacy. I would ask workplaces to add captions to online training, to provide transcripts for teleconferences, to update policies and processes.
I sought out organisations that actively promoted being inclusive and valuing diversity – and I’d specifically target them as employers.
Workplace Bullying, Gaslighting & Alopecia
KAREN:
You did have some pretty tough lessons about bullying, though. Are you happy to share a bit of that?
SHARON:
Yes.
My last job before I started Sign Here, I was working as an employment consultant. My background is helping people with disability find work.
I loved my job. My role was New South Wales Partnership Manager. I travelled across NSW, working with large organisations like CBA, ANZ and others to help them make roles more accessible for people with disability.
But my employer – my direct manager – was really difficult. She was awful. She went out of her way to make sure I didn’t have access to interpreters.
She would say things like,
“I don’t really believe that you’re deaf.”
“I think you use the deaf card.”
“I wish I was deaf so I could play the deaf card as well.”
It was one of the worst times of my life. I felt so lost. I felt ashamed to be deaf. It made me feel like I was nothing.
I tried to push through it. Most people with disability know how hard it is to get a job. I knew this job was amazing and well paid, and I was scared to leave.
But it got to the point where I started losing my hair. I went to my doctor, and he immediately said, “This is alopecia. What’s going on?”
I broke down and showed him messages my employer sent after hours, the things she was saying and doing. It was all behind closed doors, so other staff couldn’t see it. She was very clever.
That’s when I started learning about gaslighting. She’d write nice emails appreciating my work, but verbally tell me a completely different story. I was constantly confused.
Eventually, I had to leave.
I spent four or five months not working and seeing a counsellor to rebuild my confidence.
During that time, members of the deaf community started reaching out. They knew my employment background and asked for private support – offering to pay me to help them find work.
One by one, more deaf people came. They encouraged me. I realised there was a huge gap.
There were deaf people like me, working in jobs where they were silently dealing with bullying and had nobody to advocate for them.
That’s how Sign Here was born.
KAREN:
I’m sure the person who bullied you hasn’t progressed very far. Her emotional intelligence sounds a bit underdeveloped.
SHARON:
I look back and I actually feel sad for her. I think we could have been good friends.
I believe hurt people hurt people. I think she was hurting. There must have been something going on in the background.
KAREN:
I’ve heard many similar stories – bullies doing it behind closed doors because they don’t want to be caught.
And I totally get that when you love a job you don’t want to leave, but that one person makes every day so hard.
Mid-Episode Break
NARRATOR:
If you’re interested in getting more involved in our community and connecting with people who share your interests, you can do this by visiting our website at www.thestoryroom.au.
Starting “Sign Here”
KAREN:
Sharon, you started a business called Sign Here, and that bullying – plus people coming to you independently – really pushed you in that direction.
Can you tell us about Sign Here?
SHARON:
Sign Here does a lot!
I started by providing employment support. Then families began contacting me for Auslan teaching for their children.
Through COVID lockdown, we grew very quickly. I think the Auslan interpreters on the news really put us on the map – people became aware of Auslan and wanted to learn.
I realised I couldn’t do it alone.
My first employee was a deaf man who worked for Flight Centre, organising holidays for the deaf community – because deaf people need holidays, too!
Sadly, during COVID he lost his job. He reached out to me asking if there was any work, so he started teaching Auslan.
From there we grew.
Now we provide:
Auslan teaching
Employment supports for the deaf community
Advocacy in workplaces
Auslan interpreting
Auslan translations for videos and websites
Deaf awareness training for workplaces
We provide as much as we can around the deaf community and Auslan. The only thing we don’t really do is support work.
KAREN:
Do you love your work?
SHARON:
I love it so much.
I wake up every day grateful – grateful for every client we meet, every organisation and stakeholder.
I wouldn’t be doing what I love if I hadn’t gone through that terrible time. I’m even grateful for that, because it forced me to start Sign Here.
It’s been an incredible experience.
Growth, Confidence & COVID
KAREN:
How do you think you’ve grown as a person?
SHARON:
I’m definitely much stronger.
I probably have less patience when I find out someone is being bullied – I want to act quickly, because I know delaying support is not good.
It’s also made me realise, I can do this.
I never thought I could run a business. I don’t have a formal business background or “business mind”. I’ve had wonderful people who encouraged and supported me to start Sign Here – people who had more faith in me than I had in myself.
I’m really grateful for them.
KAREN:
That’s often the case – we don’t value ourselves enough. We get imposter syndrome.
And with business, sometimes you just have to dive in and learn as you go. As women, many of us want all the answers upfront, whereas men often just fumble through and figure it out.
SHARON:
I remember the first time I sent an invoice through MYOB. I had to go to YouTube to work out how to edit and fix it because I’d done it wrong. I think I spent two hours on it!
But looking back, I’m grateful I learned so much about starting a business, because even though I’ve handed some tasks to someone else now, I understand what’s happening.
It’s empowering to know what people are talking about when they discuss finances or systems.
KAREN:
It’s amazing that you grew during COVID.
SHARON:
I’m still blown away. Before COVID, it was just me. It was very lonely.
When COVID hit, I’d never done any online support. Suddenly, I had to shift everything: Auslan teaching online, employment support online.
It turned out to be a huge positive change. We grew quickly and I was able to employ more people.
It was bizarre, because for many people COVID destroyed their businesses. For me, it was the opposite.
KAREN:
At the end of COVID, how many employees did you have?
SHARON:
At the end of COVID, around 7 or 8.
KAREN:
And now?
SHARON:
From the last count, 17 staff.
KAREN:
Woo hoo! That’s huge – almost not a small business anymore.
SHARON:
Yes, it’s definitely grown a lot.
I’m so grateful. We have a wonderful team. Most of our team are deaf.
It means so much to me to employ deaf people and see them grow. A lot of them had never had a permanent job before joining us.
Being able to give them that opportunity – to build their skills, to buy their own home, to be believed in – that’s really special.
Partnerships, Family & Boundaries
KAREN:
I want to ask about an accomplishment you’re most proud of in Sign Here.
SHARON:
There are so many.
Firstly, I’m proud that my husband is part of the Sign Here journey. He left his full-time job and has been working with me full-time for the past two years. That was a big leap of faith.
I’m proud of my team.
And I’m proud that we’re changing people’s lives. If I can help the next generation not go through what I went through – and what those before me went through – that’s what I’m most proud of.
KAREN:
That’s a huge legacy for one “little” business, and for you, Sharon. And I know you’ll do it.
SHARON:
I’ll do my very best.
KAREN:
Let’s talk about your family. You have two children with your husband, and they are hearing.
SHARON:
Yes. I’m the only deaf person in my family, so I get to sleep peacefully at night! If the neighbours are having a party, my family are tired the next day and I’m fresh.
Because my husband and I work together, we have to set boundaries. That can be difficult, but it’s important.
I also care for my brother and my mum – she’s 78 – so there’s a lot on my plate.
This year I’m learning to have more self-care and to say no. I’m a bit of a “yes” person. I’m learning to ask, “Do I really need to do this?” or “Can someone else take this on?” and give my staff opportunities to build their skills too.
Partnerships & Job Access
KAREN:
Are there any specific partnerships or collaborations that have contributed to Sign Here’s growth?
SHARON:
Yes.
We work a lot with Bus Stop Films. They’re based in the Sutherland Shire but work across Australia, providing inclusive and diverse film projects. They have many staff with disabilities. We provide Auslan support, and acting advice for deaf and hard of hearing performers.
We also work with local councils, participating in Disability Action Plans.
We partner with JobAccess, a government organisation that provides employment assistance funding for people with disability. Many employers don’t know this funding exists, so we often work closely with JobAccess to help both employers and employees access that support.
Advice for Families of Deaf/Hard of Hearing Children
KAREN:
I’d love some advice for listeners who have a family member – maybe a young person – who is deaf or hard of hearing. Where should they start?
SHARON:
First, I’d say: congratulations on your baby. How wonderful that they’re part of the deaf community. It’s a beautiful, special community.
The reality is, many people feel sad when they find out their child is deaf. But there are so many opportunities now.
You only have to look at me – I’ve started a business. If it’s possible for me, it’s possible for anyone, regardless of hearing loss or disability.
I think it’s important for families to support each other, ask lots of questions, talk to different organisations, and join deaf Facebook groups where they can ask questions.
I strongly believe in offering both spoken and sign language. There’s no harm in giving children all of the tools and supports available, and letting them decide as they grow what feels right.
They may become bilingual like me, or prefer one language over the other. The important thing is that they have the choice and the opportunity to explore.
Story Room Live Experience
KAREN:
This is your first podcast today, and when you came to my live Story Room event in Cronulla, that was a first as well, wasn’t it?
SHARON:
Yes, it was.
KAREN:
You also provided Auslan interpreters for all six storytellers that night – which for me was just magic.
Can you share how you felt coming onto the stage?
SHARON:
Seeing all the faces in the crowd was really humbling – knowing they’d bought tickets to listen to our stories.
I’ll admit, I was thinking about it for a month beforehand. I was nervous.
I was sharing my raw bullying story, and I’d never really spoken about it publicly. I didn’t want people to see me as weak, or feel sorry for me – because it’s shaped who I am today.
I had mixed emotions and I didn’t know how people would react.
But at the end, people came up to me saying how much they enjoyed my story and how much it resonated with them. That meant so much.
It was almost a healing moment for me. Being able to share that story was very special.
KAREN:
For me, having you on stage was like being given a bar of gold. It was such a gift.
It also really confirms the name of this podcast and the tagline for The Story Room – Sharing Stories, Changing Lives.
You saw it that night: people came up to you afterwards, and it changed lives. That’s why these stories matter, and why being as inclusive as possible is so important.
SHARON:
It was wonderful for me too – to see the other stories and to have access through the Auslan interpreter.
I’d never known there was such a thing where people shared their stories in an audience like that. It was new for me, and I felt very privileged to be there and to witness those stories in my own language. I’m really grateful.
Closing Reflections
KAREN:
I just want to remind people listening that you are lip-reading everything I say on a screen, on a recording platform. You can’t hear anything, and yet you’re so spot on.
You blow me away. You’re a very clever and wonderful woman. Thank you.
SHARON:
Thank you. Thank you so much for supporting me, Karen, and for giving me this opportunity.
And I have to let you know – at the end of the night, I’m exhausted from all the lip-reading! That’s probably why I sleep so well.
KAREN:
Sharon, I really look forward to watching your journey with Sign Here, seeing you on stage again, and just watching you grow – because you are a wonderful woman.
SHARON:
Thank you. Thank you so much, Karen. Thanks again for having me.
Host Wrap-Up
KAREN:
A special thanks to Sharon Zabregas for sharing her inspiring journey and shedding light on the incredible work of Sign Here.
If you enjoyed this episode, please take a moment to comment with your thoughts and experiences – your voice matters.
Don’t forget to check the podcast description for links to Sign Here and additional resources. And if you know someone who would benefit from this conversation, please share the episode with them.
Let’s continue the dialogue and work towards a more inclusive world. Together, we can make a difference.
Until next time, this is Karen, signing off.
Outro (Narration)
NARRATOR:
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